Time to go home

I’m in a club. It’s late. I’ve had too much to drink, and I’m bored. I’m about to go home when some girl walks up to me.

Hey.

Where are you from?

America. You?

China, of course.

Of course.

How long have you been in Shanghai?

Two and a half years.

Oh, cool.

Yeah. Are you from Shanghai?

Yeah.

Cool.

Do you want to go see the place where they used to execute people?

Umm-

Haha. I’m just kidding. Where have you been tonight?

I went to get all-you-can-eat teppanyaki.

Oh yeah? Which one?

The one on Yan’an Lu.

Oh yeah. Yan’an Lu. The one near Maoming Lu?

Yeah.

Did you ever try to skin a cat before?

Umm…

You know how there’s more than one way.

Yeah, I’ve heard.

Because that’s what you say, right?

Yeah, but we usually use it differently. Different contexts, you know?

Oh, I always get my man-slave to skin my cat.

Umm…

I’m just kidding. I don’t have any cats.

Well, look. I’ve got to go. I’m tired.

Okay. Well, it was nice to meet you.

Yeah, you too.

I’ll call you.

You didn’t give me your number.

It doesn’t matter.